Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
