Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
