just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize