One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize