If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
The ass gains better be worth it
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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