Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Randomize
