I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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