Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
