last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
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