when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
she peed on how many people?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
