grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
