PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
