he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
