do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize