I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
