I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Of course I have a pirate flag
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
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