I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize