I just saw a hot homeless man
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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