we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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