Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
someone owes me an orgasm
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
