Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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