Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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