I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
