So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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