check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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