Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
