Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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