I don't usually arrange sex via text message
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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