I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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