pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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