this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You've changed since you got that strap on
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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