6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
