Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
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