Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
