so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize