a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Randomize
