I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
