found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
