Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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