I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
You have to summon your inner elephant
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
