i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
