Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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