I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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