dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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