I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I party with great urgency now.
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