butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
