Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
