Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
