I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
