dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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